Another great post. Reminds me of the 8 C's and 4 P's of Internal Family Systems (IFS) [a type of 'parts' therapy for trauma] by which we will know our True Selves:
calm
curiosity
compassion
confidence
courage
clarity
connectedness
creativity
patience
presence
perspective
perseverance
[I wonder though if there is a danger for us folks with chronic issues that we may "over-identify" with our values, in particular, that our propensity for perfectionism and rigidity might make us hold ourselves to impossibly high standards, and when we inevitably fail to live up to these, as all humans do, we will shame/blame ourselves too much?]
You make such a great point! I love to be a martyr!
It’s a fine balance to walk, isn’t it? I find it easy to set myself up for failure so I have to work diligently at setting myself up for success, which means internalizing an understanding that striving for perfection in my values, ideals, or progress is only detrimental. It’s hard to remember to stop and check where I’m at and if I’m headed in the right direction. I think this is why purposeful reflection on one’s own values, perspective, and goals (internal and external) and growth to ensure we stay the course and not drift off onto some road promising perfection and the single one antidote to my distress.
It’s incredible how much knowing my values has changed my perspective on myself and my own life. And it’s something we don’t really think about in terms of mental health. I’m so glad it was helpful to you! I’m looking forward to our video chat!
Another great post. Reminds me of the 8 C's and 4 P's of Internal Family Systems (IFS) [a type of 'parts' therapy for trauma] by which we will know our True Selves:
calm
curiosity
compassion
confidence
courage
clarity
connectedness
creativity
patience
presence
perspective
perseverance
[I wonder though if there is a danger for us folks with chronic issues that we may "over-identify" with our values, in particular, that our propensity for perfectionism and rigidity might make us hold ourselves to impossibly high standards, and when we inevitably fail to live up to these, as all humans do, we will shame/blame ourselves too much?]
You make such a great point! I love to be a martyr!
It’s a fine balance to walk, isn’t it? I find it easy to set myself up for failure so I have to work diligently at setting myself up for success, which means internalizing an understanding that striving for perfection in my values, ideals, or progress is only detrimental. It’s hard to remember to stop and check where I’m at and if I’m headed in the right direction. I think this is why purposeful reflection on one’s own values, perspective, and goals (internal and external) and growth to ensure we stay the course and not drift off onto some road promising perfection and the single one antidote to my distress.
Being present should be a value 🤣
This. Was. Awesome. The poetry at the beginning drew me in immediately,
and by the end I was, am, contemplating what my core values are. I'm totally going to paint rocks and keep them on my desk. Thank you, Adrian!!!!!
It’s incredible how much knowing my values has changed my perspective on myself and my own life. And it’s something we don’t really think about in terms of mental health. I’m so glad it was helpful to you! I’m looking forward to our video chat!
I'm going to try to find three stones this weekend! Looking forward to our chat, too!